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Return to the 80s Post and Podcast
Stuck in the 80s Post and Podcast - Round 1 Round 2
Here at Old School Evil, we watched a lot more than just Saturday morning cartoons - we watched a ton of movies too. And 80s movies had some of the greatest villains, ranging from high school bullies, to international terrorists, to mystical monsters. And I loved to hate all of them, no matter how realistic or ridiculous they were.
However, there is one villain in 80s movies that literally terrified me, whether it could exist or not. Imagine , if you have to, that you're a kid that loved the Transformers. You find out there's a movie coming out and you wait in line to buy a ticket. You're dying to see the Autobots battle it out with the Decepticons on the big screen. The movie starts and you see this:
In just two and a half minutes, you witness this ginormous planet eat an entire world and its whole population (save one). A world full of men, women, and children, who you saw playing and talking a few moments before, is summarily devoured and digested to power this cosmic monster. And we learn the planet's name is Unicron. Next time we see Unicron, we learn that it feels - it bursts forth with a howling rage at seeing the Autobot Matrix of Leadership. Shortly after, we find out that this planet does more than screaming, it speaks! With Orson Welles's legendary voice, no less.
Unicron summons a dying Megatron and grants him and his fellow Decepticons new bodies and a mission to destroy the Matrix. When Galvatron (the reformatted Megatron) fails Unicron, his master sends a searing hot pain into brain to correct him. Incredulously, Galvatron plots against Unicron once he steals the Matrix, even trying to open it on Unicron's surface. Unicron retaliates, revealing himself to be a Transformer and setting his sights on destroying Cybertron after having eaten two if its moons. After taking a few shots to his face from his former servant, Unicron pinches Galvatron drops him in his maw.
Scale issues aside, Unicron is a truly monstrous villain, unrivaled by anything I had seen in my youth. Yes, I admit it, I don't think I saw Star Wars as a kid. Anyway, the writers of Transformers took something already imposing, the Death Star, and made it even scarier. Since this movie, Unicron has become a fixture in Transformers lore even 30 years later. But here in his initial appearance, he blew the minds of a whole generation. As if they weren't traumatized enough after seeing Optimus Prime die.